My Grandpa Is Technologically Troubled

1st in the 'Written in the Stars 2013' competition

I LOVE spending time with Grandpa but talk technology and he's troubled.
Grandpa is from the dark ages, when RAM was a male sheep with massive horns,
Apple meant either Granny Smith and Golden Delicious,
Gig was a show and byte was something one endured from a vicious dog or a Red Belly Black Snake.
Like when I told him I'd bought a mouse, he told me he'd never liked rodents.
He thinks computer security means locking the front door of his house and
bad command means he failed in the parenting department.
He believes that back-up is reversing a car out of a sticky situation.
When I told Grandpa that I love playing with my WII,
he said he’d have to talk to my mother about that.
Like the time I mentioned that I had a bug and he said I needed to get more rest.
I told him to chill out. Probably just a virus and he booked me in to see a doctor.
I LOVE spending time with my grandpa but sometimes it’s embarrassing.
My friend asked if I’d heard about two terabyte hard drives and Grandpa said,
"Hard drives! Did Noah mention my trip across the Nullarbor in the old Holden?
What a hard drive! Three flat tyres, a bust radiator AND a cracked windscreen!"

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