I Am Jayden
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Nikita Lobo, Grade 11
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Short Story
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2013
Jayden’s P.O.V.
My name is Jayden and I am autistic. I have thoughts, feelings and memories but no one knows. People look at me and see a boy who has no control over his actions, they cannot hear my thoughts, they do not know me. I am a normal seventeen year old in a body that cannot function properly. I know what I want to do but I cannot do it. I was born with Autistic Spectrum Disorder. My body has a mind of its own yet my brain is fully capable of its own thoughts. I spend my days in rooms filled with people trying to cure me, but I am not ill. I have visited countless hospitals, consultants, therapists and even mediators but they all say the same thing, there is no hope. All I want is to talk and run and be normal. I can’t ever fit in with others, I don’t belong here.
When I go outside I see other teenagers, they look at me differently. I am different. I have a voice but I cannot be heard. I am Jayden.
Cathy’s P.O.V. (Jayden’s Mother)
I don’t know what to do anymore. I took Jayden to a park and he started screaming, He cannot stay calm. I love my son but I wish he was normal, I cannot do this anymore. Jason left because of this, and it’s all I can do to keep from following his example but I know I can’t leave my baby. He was normal once, well he was younger and you couldn’t tell but I know that boy is still in there somewhere, I just need to reach in and find him.
Jason’s P.O.V. (Jayden’s Father)
I think about them every day, I regret the decisions I made every single minute of my life. I had to do what I did, I had no choice, I couldn’t handle it. I miss both of them but I still think I’ll go back, one day.