Whirlpool Of Thoughts

• Chantal Maroun, Grade 11, St Charbel's College
• Short Story
• 2014

Excellence Award in the 'The Text Generation 2014' competition

I found myself trapped in my mind; a deep dark whirlpool of thoughts that’s drained out and cleansed. Oblivious to my surroundings. Blinded from reality. Who thought I would end up in this dreadful state? Witnesses of similar blindfolds caught me with their magnetic force. I was misled into a journey of dismay, yet an unveiling experience of the soul. Having lost myself was the worst part of it all. The constant attention, deceptive kindness and fake smiles I received was what drew me into that crowd and caused me to jump out of my comfort zone to enter into a world of hell where the hero must fight the villain.
What I could remember the most were the hallucinations that haunted me following the drugs. And yes, I went to an extent where the pressure overtook my life. They were disguised as angels all along, using their magic force to fish for fans to seduce and destroy them. I was certainly a victim who was induced gullibly to wear their identity wristband. Sometimes in life you walk down a road you wish not to follow but then you’re drawn into a road where pleasure gets the hang of you and you lose yourself in the moment. But then you discover a meaningful lesson; that there is more to what meets the eye and that deep within the soul of the evil being, there is somewhat a touch of pity and sorrow.
To make the story worse, I was stripped of my dignity, possessed by these large petrifying beasts and wicked witches who constantly fished for fans and deformed them in their own likeness. They were like peasant men yet looked as happy as free slaves. I managed to get caught suddenly onto their web but then it came to me like a blow to the head when I realised what came my way. They were filled with sin and encouraged others to fall with them just as bad yet in a wise angelic manner. All I wanted was a new experience, to explore the outside world but who knew I would become a massive bully like them, a risk taker like them, the girl I dread. Truly I was insecure and lost my mind in the moment of pleasure.
But then I saw through the window of these girls soul. They were not happy at all, in fact, selling themselves for the sake of self-satisfaction which they tried to seek yet couldn’t find. Constantly filling those empty gaps of their lives with pleasure and their egos with worthless things. These girls were anguished deeply and like me, were searching for that something to complete them. Yet they bombard others with insults and temptations that scarred me within and lead me into Normopathy but then again I wanted to stay caught with the running sheep. I consider myself lucky to have understood this situation before time ran out because now…now I am pleased and satisfied…