Take My Hand

He pushes me under. Rough hands grip onto my neck as he holds me there. My screams are dulled by the water that surrounds me, my lungs filling with each cry. Arms and legs thrash against his grasp as I try to free myself. He’s too strong. It’s too dark to see the other life that swirls around me. Living, breathing. As mine slips away with each second that passes by…

“It’s okay to be scared,” Joseph murmurs softly. I look out at the water that ripples across the lake, its beauty clouded by my fear. A heart-wrenching fear that pushes down on me with full force, one I can’t ignore. Painful memories continue to plague my thoughts.

Staring down at the water, a single tear drops off my cheek, disturbing the image that stares back. A shiver echoes throughout my back as a small sob leaks through my lips.

“I can’t do it,” I say in response.

… He can feel my heart beat pulse against his fingers, tightening his hold with every soft thump. The hair that lifelessly floats around me stills as I begin to lose the will to fight. My lungs plea for air as if a heavy weight was rested on them. Time slows, along with my heart…

“We can do this together, you just have to trust me,” his broken eyes that emulate my own, stir something within. I’m his lifeline. He’s lost sight of who he is because I haven’t been there. But at the same time, how can I support him when I am broken myself. Crippled by the past, unable to accept it.

I stand at the waters’ edge with no intention of going further. But he needs me to. I want to find a will to live, with the man that stands beside me. Willing to fight. For if I don’t, I feel as if I will be forever stuck in this whirlwind of pain. My toes graze the water.

… I’m fading. Drifting into darkness. My heart plays with the line that separates life and death, skipping back and forth between the two. I feel him let go. My fight is over. A light shines through the water…

Wind whistles through the trees casting off shadows across the lake. Sweat trickles down my forehead as the hot sun caresses me with its heat. The thump of my chest becomes stronger with every breath I inhale. “Take my hand,” Joseph looks at me, fear lurking in his eyes.

… I can feel someone graze my face with their gentle hands. Different from before. Loud noises surround me. As I flutter my eyes open a frantic pair looks back. My lungs fill with air as I gasp for breath. He grabs a hold of my hand and strokes my hair as I freeze in shock. “I’m Joseph, I’m here to help you okay?” I notice the uniform that clings tightly to his body from the water. “Look at me alright? You’re safe now,” his voice now brings me comfort. I don’t look away again…

I take his hand, looking softly at the man who had saved my life. Breathing deeply we take the first steps in, an icy chill glazes up my legs. But it’s okay, I’m okay. I look at him once more and feel it. Safety.

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