Yearning

They say that time heals all wounds. They lied. Every breath of my lungs, every nerve of my body, every inch of my soul still aches for you.

As the first golden rays of sun flicker through my window to gently kiss the small of my back and the silent breeze wisps past the blinds to softly caress my neck, I am awakened with thoughts of you on my mind. I wouldn't say that you crossed my mind regularly because that would imply that there were points at which my mind was free from your grasp, and we both know that simply isn’t true.

As I stretch and amble outdoors, the morning dew on the soft grass glides gracefully across the ventral of my feet and I can almost feel your touch. The first songbird breathes its whistle melodically down from the flora, before its body tenses and it springs from the branch; it leaves behind no trace apart from a gentle rustle of the oak leaves. The sounds envelope and encapsulate my ears and seem to whisper your name.

As the crisp air fills my lungs with life, and as the formation of your name catches in the back of my throat, I can taste you. A tear trickles silently down my cheek, as the speed of my breath begins to quicken. The ache of your absence is a heaviness in my heart which threatens to consume me and drag me to my knees. I yearn for you.

As my willpower crumbles and I head towards my vehicle, your address comes immediately to the forefront of my mind. Past memories come flooding back to me in vivid technicolour as I subconsciously begin to draw closer to you. My family disagreed with our relationship from the start, labelling it as unhealthy. I don’t care. You can’t help your cravings.

As my stomach clenches, I can feel each muscle begging me to turn around. Sweat begins to condense on my temple and I struggle to hear anything above my teeth nervously chattering, the sound reverberating through my head. Click. Click. Click. The car accelerates at an alarming rate. I can practically smell you in the air.

As I pull up in front of your home, I don’t bother knocking. I barge into the room I am so accustomed to, suppressed emotion coming back like tsunami tides. I am powerless to resist. My eyes lock on you and it is like no time has passed since our last meeting. My feet propel me forward, almost involuntarily. Objects in my peripheral vision blur, my vision tunnels until all I see is you. My arms outstretch, my fingers graze your curves. I quiver as I take a juicy bite out of my tantalising burger, the many secretions oozing onto my taste buds and seeping deep into my soul. The Golden Arches mockingly stare down at me from above. I find that diets become harder with time.

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