Late Night Thoughts

• Leanne Miller, Grade 12
• Short Story
• 2018

A dark abyss, A wolf howling at the empty moon and a girl with too many thoughts in her head. A single night can change everything, a simple mistake you could never live down, a memory that will haunt you forever and a voice that never softens. There is over a thousand words in the English language and I can’t think of a single thing to say that would make any sense to you, there is nothing I could say that would make your broken heart beat again. I tell you I am here to stay, and you walk away, I fight to show you you’re not alone and you push me down, I let you go and you hate me, I tell you I love you, you say I’m lying, I fight for you, you fight against me, I give up, you yell, I scream. There is always a winner and a loser and no matter what, you will always be both. I can win this fight but…. I can lose you. I told you I would die for you, you were the reason I took my last breath. You just read 196 words and you won’t understand a word of them, you may think you do but you don’t. To you these are just pointless words, written for no reason, just letters pushed together to make a empty sentence, just words nothing more nothing less. Too many thoughts not enough time to share them. You can read this a hundred times and you still won’t understand how hard I tried to be what you needed, to show you I was good enough, to prove to you I have worth, to make you listen even if only for a second in the hopes you will understand, but you don’t. you will always be just a voice in my head that doesn’t listen, I bet you thought this was meant for someone, it wasn’t. it was meant for one reason and one reason only, you may be wondering what that reason is, or you’ve already stopped reading. I wrote this because it was one of many thoughts in my head, the reason for these words are up to you, ignore them, feel the meaning in them or use them as your own, but these will always be my words, my thoughts, my hidden secrets. You can fight till your last breath, but the only thing I’m going to ask you directly is what are you fighting for? If you can’t answer that then is it even worth fighting for. If you’re going to fight for something you need to know, what it is, why you’re doing it and how long you will fight for. Don’t fight for someone that wouldn’t fight for you and don’t fight for something you don’t want. See just pointless words, just a girl with too many thoughts in her head and too much time on her hands.