Letter To Loneliness

• Melissa Ho, Grade 9, Auburn Girls High School -
• Short Story
• 2018

Excellence Award in the 'Horizon of Dreams 2018' competition

To: Loneliness,

Loneliness is a strange thing. It happens at the most irregular times, quickly eating you up into a tiny ball of nothingness. Sometimes it stays there, following you around places like a shadow on a sunny day. Other times, it simply disappears, as if it was never there in the first place. I wish it could go away, but alas, loneliness is somehow always apart of my life, whether it be good or bad. It's like dust that cannot be brushed off, no matter how hard you try. It sticks and sticks, it clings and clings, it does morally everything you wish it hadn't done. But, loneliness does it anyway. Everyday, I cope with many emotions. Somehow, loneliness is never the first of my various emotions. However, It is always there, sleeping in the corner of my mind amidst everything else, just silently waiting to suddenly pop up. Today, my day wasn't so great, and my emotions weren't the happiest, hence loneliness coming forth to present itself as if it were a replacement. Tears slowly dripped down my bare face, my dry lips tasting the saltiness. Loneliness is a weird thing. It isn't like grief where it cracks your heart into small shards and consumes your entire body, but a neutral ground where your heart hurts, but isn't as painful as grief. It's just there, lingering more so in your mind, triggering memories of happiness and what ifs. It asks you 'what if I did this first' 'what if they did this first' and so on. My heart wasn't in pain, though shudders of pain quickly shuddered through to tell myself that loneliness had come to greet me once again. I now sit under my bed sheets, with thoughts of reminiscent and loneliness sprinkled throughout. Although it may linger in the back of my mind, waiting for an opportunity to arise, I am glad it is there. It has helped me overcome my distant, so-called friends and instead make new ones that actually care for my well being. Thank you loneliness, and for that, I hope you help me venture into the unknown by staying by my side, always lurking in the depths of my mind.

~ Myself