Torn Apart

Excellence Award in the 'Horizon of Dreams 2018' competition

All my life I've felt like a burden, I've tried so hard to make people like me to the point where I've completely forgotten who the real me is. I always fake my emotions smiled through everything even though deep down I'm hurting I’m sick and tired of faking my life I just want to tell someone how
I feel but I’m afraid no one will listen. I often dream that I'm standing on a bridge but just as I'm about to jump into the freezing, deep water a hand grabs my hand stopping me. I don't know whose hand this is but for some reason I tend to feel safer with this hand grabbing me, I wish I could
live in my dreams and know whose hand this is only if dreams came true life would be great.
Every day is the same for me wake up, go to school, get bullied, spend every hour at school alone and come home where I'm alone again. When I was 14 my parents died in a car accident and gave me their house and money, my parents were famous inventors so the money they gave me can last me a lifetime. Now I'm 17 and over these couple of years I've become suicidal and lost hope in
everything, I didn't become this way because I want to I became this way because of the way people treated me.
My parents were the only ones I relied on but ever since their death I've never found my place in this world we call home. To me the only place that was home was where my parents are, at first, I thought that I could make it in this world but over time I started to wonder if I was up there in heaven with my parents would I be happier? Would life be simpler? I honestly don’t know what led me to thinking this anymore, maybe it's because this place reminds me too much of my parents, I should move.
It's been 2 weeks and here I am in California, and here I was thinking that life would change I guess I have to face the fact that my past will never let me go. Well to be honest only one thing changed, I met this guy named Laryce when he asked me where I was from I started crying and walked away. I
didn't cry because of my parents I cried because he noticed the cuts on my wrists and didn't judge or bully me. I bumped into him a few times later and turned out we go to the same school. Overtime we became friends but my old habits weren't gone, I eventually started to realise that maybe my life
could change and was this the beginning of my adventure?

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