YUK!

• Jian Chin, Grade 5
• Short Story
• 2016

YUK!

I am standing in the kitchen and my mum is cooking, I feel like making mischief. I get my hand and spit on it and I drip it into the soup my mum is cooking. Luckily she is on the phone and she doesn't notice. Next, I put my hands in my pants, dig my butt, and I put it into the soup. Then I go to the toilet and I do a pee. I go out and I don't flush. I go to the kitchen and grab a small bowl and I go back to the toilet. I take a scoop out of the toilet bowl, (which has not been flushed and still has my pee in it) I go back to the kitchen and pour my pee into the soup. I try to think of more crazy ideas and then suddenly out of nowhere I have a brilliant idea, in fact, the grossest idea anybody has thought of. I go and fetch the same bowl I used to scoop out my pee and I fill it with one quarter of water, I pick my nose and then I put my hand inside the water and the nose pickings on my hand float into the water. I then take my hand out of the water and lick my hand and put it back inside. I go out into the garden and I get some soil and put it into the water. I also try to find some ants. So I got dirt and ants on my hands, and I put it into the water. So now I have nose pickings, my saliva, dirt and ants in one quarter of water. I go inside the kitchen and pour my gross formula into the soup. Then I give it a good stir. Then my mum comes out and says “young man what are you doing?” and I say, I'm helping you cook... Uh oh, I hope we’re not having this for dinner.