March Of The Teddies

• John Bivell, Grade 4
• Short Story
• 2010

March of the Teddies

Today was the Teddy Bear Picnic. Every student at school brought one along, or a stuffed toy. One girl brought Maggie Simpson, and a plump boy brought a stupendous, leviathan Easter Bunny with a blue Easter Hat that said ‘Where I go, Easter goes! Happy Easter 2009!!’ Goliath, the ecstatic Star Wars enthusiast, brought a small Ewok teddy. I had a small, white Sydney Children's Hospital bear.

I settled down on the rug next to freckly Karl (who was eyeing my lamingtons) sitting with a bowl of tomato salad. I struck up a conversation with Karl and Josh, who were wrestling their Eels & Storms bears.

Suddenly we heard a yelp. Heads turned. A portly man with zilch hair stood waving a tall, green bottle. On closer inspection it read ‘Barcelona Olive Oil, the finest- $25.00’. He wore a Size 22 shirt with striped PJ shorts and a BRATZ doll hat on his pink head.

He grabbed one of the students, Michael, and tipped sickly yellow liquid onto his hair. It trickled down Michael’s face and seeped into the fur of his black bear.

The man smiled and disappeared around the corner and onto the woodpile. Then the noise died.

Silence…total silence. Everyone stood swaying on their feet, thinking the same thing: what was that all about…

We heard another scream, this time behind us. And there was Michael growing brown fur!

It was outrageous!! Right in front of me someone was growing four paws and a black snout. Michael was shrinking rapidly, the fur covering his whole body. And in the time it took to tie a shoelace, Michael was a brown teddy with white paws. Everyone screamed and ran.

The other teddies jumped to their feet, flexing their muscles. In one powerful wave, they ran into the fleeing mob. Where they touched bare skin, the unfortunate victim would fall writhing to the ground, fur spreading from the bear’s touch.

I ran, sweat pouring down my face. The Easter Rabbit loomed up in my way, sneering. I whacked him on his evil fluffy bottom. “Beat that!” I yelled.

Suddenly a heavy weight crashed into me. Looking up, I saw the Ewok teddy coming for another blow. He stretched out his paw, claws extended and….
… above flew a gigantic 35 metre from wingtip-to-wingtip, screeching, bear eating, salivating, four legged, diamond scaled, grey-black, spiny, tail-thrashing monstrosity of a bird. The Ewok scrambled off. “May the Force be with you,” I thought. The bird dived after the teddy.

I saw the man again, this time holding a bowl of… lumpy red salad. His hand drew back in a catapult motion. I saw my teddy lying on the ground beneath the tree. It leaped through the air, knocking the bowl from his hand and saving me from a bad fur day.

The mixture slopped all over the man. He screamed piercingly. And there on the playground asphalt was a round bear with a pink doll’s hat.