Yabby Story

So this is what happened. I’m a yabby. I was crawling along the turbid dam floor until IT hit me; yes that’s right, IT hit me. Okay, so it wasn’t exactly that “MYSTERIOUS!” it was just my friend being an idiot, like usual, hitting me over the head with his claw. But then IT hit me! It was a delicious, scrumptious smell of…of…ROTTING MEAT! EEEEEEWWWWW. But anyway, for the sake of this story, I just so happened to follow the delicious (revolting) smell of the meat.
I crawled along with my friend and then…AHHH! What the? What? Huh? Wha-? HELP ME! Darn you stupid-rookie-friend-called-Nipper! Stupid saltwater yabbies, they have no clue how to control themselves. I swear they must be naturally drunk or something because they’re always falling on their side where they have their biggest…OH! Okay that was my fault; they fall over because they have an oversized claw; suckers. They look so scrawny, stupid and gross compared to us beautiful, muscular, equal-clawed freshwater yabbies. So anyway, I was stuck in this green thing. It was twisting around me and caught my claws, so I nipped the weedy-green stuff. I escaped and looked at the “Thing”, it was…it was… I actually had no idea what it was, so I travelled back to the main burrow with my stupid saltwater nipper friend.
I stood outside the hole, tapping the rock stuck in the wall with my claw. I did this to alert the Alpha yabby to “LET ME IN OR I’LL NIP YA HEAD OFF WITH MY CLAW OF AWESOMENESS!” So he let me in. I told him of some strange “Thing” just by the bank of the dam emitting an awful-I-I mean delicious smell. So he spoke with “His Almighty Alpha Wisdom” (what a load of something-that-looks-like-mud-but-isn’t). He told me this, “In the days when I was a young nipper like yourself, and the ladies were dropping at my feet, and-“
“Yeah, go on mate”.
“Oh, sorry young one, you mustn’t have the lady charm like I do”.
“Yeah, I DON’T CARE! JUST, go on…”
“Right, so I was minding my own business one day, and yes I was completely alone, completely. I still had the women following me at my feet. And so I smelt a smell just like the one you smelt.”
Ha! He said “smell”! I thought.
“So I entered the cave-like entrance of the “Thing”, and the smell was getting stronger. Dazed, I continued through and just as I discovered that the smell was rotting meat inside a netted pocket, I swam back towards the entrance; but it wouldn’t let me through! Panicked, I dropped, to the depths of the trap, sobbing.”
So I left, THANKING him of course.
With my salted friend, I crawled back to the “Thing” and I walked in… I was thrown back out, AND I LIVED!
Oh, P.S, my stupid saltwater nipper friend went back to the ocean blue, where he said a Mantis Shrimp nearly murdered him! HA!

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