I Was Only 19

• Ian Sunderland, Grade 10
• Short Story
• 2011

My head was shaking from the blast, I couldn’t see. Stumbling, I fell towards a tree and leant on it to catch my breath. Then I saw it. A cold metallic glint just buried in the ground. A landmine! Where was Frankie, I had to warn him!
“F… Frankie!”
I only just managed to call out his name as I saw him walking towards me, towards the mine!
“Frankie no! Frankie!”
I was screaming out to him when I realised I was walking towards him. I couldn’t stop. I started running towards the landmine, but my legs felt like they were dragging through tar. I was choking on thick black smoke, I dived towards the landmine. No, I dived towards freedom, an escape from this cruel dark world so full of horrors! My whole world shook and the last thing I heard before I fell into a peaceful blackness was the scream of a dying man.

I was woken by the cold embrace of the dry, hard ground as I fell out of my bed.
“Jesus Scotty, are you ok?” Tom said gently.
As I opened my eyes, I saw everyone in my tent staring at me in shock, almost horror. Then I noticed the tears streaming down my face.
“What the.. Yeah I’m fine.. What happened?” I asked, confused.
“You were screaming in your sleep, something ‘bout an escape or freedom or something, are you alright Scotty?” Asked Roger.
“Yeah, I’m going for a walk,” I said. “I need to clear my head.”
I got up off the ground and walked outside. “What the hell is happening to me? Christ, I’m only 19..” I thought to myself as I wondered through the camp. Then I started to remember my dream. Frankie found me an hour later in the very corner of the camp, curled up in a ball whispering.
“Shit! Scotty what happened?” He exclaimed.
He gave me some water and helped me to my feet.
“Whats going on, Scotty?” asked Frankie.
“I just want to go home Frankie. I just want to be happy again!” I found myself crying again. I couldn’t control it.
“For God’s sake Frankie, I’m only 19! I shouldn’t be here!” I exclaimed.
“Its alright Scotty, I’m here for you mate.” Frankie was the only guy in the squad who could make me believe that it would all be alright. He gave me a cigarette, which helped to calm me down.

We were walking back towards our squad in the camp when we suddenly head a gunshot and saw one of our soldiers drop to the ground, dead. “Shit! Scotty get back we are being attacked!” Yelled Frankie.
We could see the Vietnamese soldiers now, between us and the rest of the camp.
“We have to go around to get back to our squad.” I realised and said to Frankie.
We turned and ran into the thick jungle, determined to get back to around in time to warn every one of the attack. All of a sudden there was an explosion and I was thrown to my feet. Disorientated, I got up slowly, shaking my head and trying to get my senses back. Then I saw it. That familiar metallic glint. I saw Frankie coming towards me. But this time my mind was made up. I sprung to my feet and rushed towards the land mine. I couldn’t let Frankie die when there was a chance I could save him! I heard a click, and then it all went black.
I woke up in a bed. Everything was white. “Is this heaven? Is it finally over?” I thought to myself. Then I looked to my left and saw a body covered with a blood-soaked blanket. For some reason I had to know who was lying dead under the cover. When I saw Frankie’s glassy dead eyes, all I saw in them was my guilt reflected back at me. I could have saved him. I wasn’t in heaven. This place had just become my hell.