Fear

• Jammie Swann, Grade 12
• Short Story
• 2011

I looked down at the raging water below as I stood at the edge of the cliff. All I had to do was take that final step and I would be free, free from it all. The water looked so tempting on this summer’s afternoon, so innocent as it waited for me. I could still back out I thought, I could refuse to give in, but even now my fear of the height from edge to water held me back. Maybe, just maybe I wouldn't do it.
I looked at the water once more, saw how it met the base of the cliff sending up a massive wave of water as it broke and foamed. I saw the jagged edge below and could only think about being smashed into those rocks again and again, pushed under by the tremendous force of the waves. I shook my head to clear the vision and tried to steady my racing heart, drawing in deep breaths to calm my nerves. I could do this, I knew I could. I would prove to the world who I really am.
Wind whistled past me as I stood closer to the edge. I had been thinking of this for so long. I had imagined it in my mind time and time again. It had played before my eyes, yet never had it turned out like this, in my mind I had never hesitated as I did now. In my mind there was nothing holding me back, yet in reality my terrifying fear of height left me shaking, tied me firmly to the world upon which I stood.
I breathed in, out, in, out. I could do this. My eyes scanned the distance between where I stood and the water, with one last deep breathe I cut the knot that tied me to this land, I took the last step and plummeted through the air, a small smile on my face. The air cradled me as I fell, making me feel as if for this one moment I could fly. Yet all this was gone too fast as with a shock I hit the icy cold water that dragged me down into its depth. Goosebumps appeared as I floated towards the darkness below. Peace swept through me as I shut my eyes and relaxed. I had made my choice, I had achieved what I wanted to do. I was happy.
Suddenly hands grabbed me from above and dragged me back towards the surface, towards the light. I opened my eyes with a sigh and with one last look towards the darkness that seemed to beckon me, I kicked my legs and with a gasp shot to the surface. My friends surrounded me cheering and clapping. I smiled proudly back and let loose a quiet laugh. I had finally conquered my crippling fear of heights. This was a day I would never forget, the day I conquered my fear. The day I finally cliff dived with all my friends.