Killer Squirrels From Outer Space

• Tom Fisher, Grade 6
• Short Story
• 2014

Everyone knows that squirrels aren’t dangerous. But once, in 1953, that all changed. You see, this year was special. It was the 100th anniversary of the disobedient, killer, hooligan skeleton competition in which disobedient, killer, hooligan skeletons competed in a cuddle competition. If you believe, you can go back to the day of the final.

Wow! I can’t believe that worked. I’ve been trying that for years and nothing! I am here, the day of the final. So here I am on the 26th of July, 1953 at the disobedient, killer, hooligan skeleton competition final.

If you don’t know, on the 26th of July 1953, the vicious squirrels from mars attacked the country of Ecuador. You see Ecuador didn’t have an army until 1 year later. They found out the hard way.

Cool, I’m back in 1953. Only 15 minutes until the final between Jack ‘Black’ Snack and Rufus ‘Nufus’ Cufus. Look at the sun. It’s a bright, bright red. ROAR! It sounds like the final is about to start.

OH MAN! Now I’m going to miss the fight. For your information, this fight only lasted 1 minute before the main event.

What luck! The countdown is starting. 10, 9, 8, 7, 6, 5, 4, 3, 2, 1, and the fight has started. The sun looks even redder; it’s almost a crimson colour. WOW! Within 27 seconds, Jack ‘Black’ Snack already has Rufus ‘Nufus’ Cufus in a Breathquencer hug. But Rufus is fighting back with a stomach swirlier. Neither will let go. It’s a battle of wills. 59 seconds. WHOOSH! The squirrels are here.

What a time to leave! These squirrels were deformed, mad and would do anything for marshmallows. And how do you kill a squirrel with a marshmallow? I don’t know, but I have a vague idea. I’m going to have to save their world.

Now how do I save these people? First, I need some marshmallows. “WATCH OUT FOR THE MARSHMALLOW FACTORY!” yelled a man in distress as a squirrel destroys the marshmallow factory. Marshmallows fly everywhere. I pick up 2 marshmallows. Now all I need is a fire. “The marshmallow factory is on fire.” Someone yells. That helps. So I burn the marshmallows and eat them. YUM!

That helped. Now I’m not hungry anymore and I can think better. Now lets go back.

I’ve got a really good idea. I need 2 marshmallows and a fire. Original. I grab the 2 nearest marshmallows, one is a sad looking one and the other one may be a potato. I burn them and stick them in the leaders eyes. As the marshmallow is still on fire, the leader goes onto the cliffs edge. I only have 1 thought. As I push it off the cliff, I feel the sweet feeling of success. In the panic, every other squirrel jumps off the cliff. I win.
So, how do you kill a squirrel with a marshmallow? Set it on fire, stick it in there eye, push it off a cliff.