Heat.

• Madison Davey, Grade 9
• Short Story
• 2022

The thing with heat is that it eventually overwhelms you. No matter how cold you are, no matter how much you desire heat, that once-welcoming warmth, without fail, transforms into an unpleasant asphyxiation.

I open the frosted-over window, an icy breeze swiftly taking over the unbearable heat. It feels nice against my wounded body, calming.
As I stand, alone, body facing the open window, I try not to notice the wooden door creaking open, I try not to react as his hand places itself against my upper back. His hand is soft. Oh very soft, so delicate.

Tears prick my eyes, threatening to spill.

‘Not now, don’t remind me…’

Without effort, without complaint, he gently guides me towards him; my eyes remain fixed on the ground, I don’t dare glance upward.
“You’re shaking,” he notices, his voice no louder than a whisper. I don’t reply, I'm too tired, too empty to manage anything, with fear that if I speak, it will just hurt more.

Tears fall, I make no effort to hold them back. No matter how many wounds, no matter how much they hurt, they’ll eventually heal, they’ll eventually be in the past. But not this one. This one will haunt me, this one will never heal. A shattered heart, a dead brother, and because of me. My actions, my fault…

He embraces my pale, trembling body, I don’t protest. I succumb to his warmth, his familiarity.

His bare palm slides under my loosely-braided hair, resting on the nape of my neck. My knees cave in, his hold tightens, not risking what might happen if he lets go.

Gently, he guides us towards the wooden floor.

Lightly, I lay my throbbing head on his right shoulder.

We lay entwined in each other's warmth, in each other's comfort.

“I’m sorry” I cry out, my voice light, but it cracks all the same.

His embrace strengthens, and mine does too as I bury my face in his shoulder — wet from my very own tears.

‘I’m sorry, oh i’m so so very sorry’ I repeat to myself, in a poor attempt of forcing forgiveness. The once unbearable heat, now a pleasant, comforting warmth. I allow my eyes to close. And despite it all, despite the unforgiving day, I fall into a restless sleep.