A Scar

• Solomon Tan, Grade 9
• Short Story
• 2022

It had been a few years since it had last happened, but every morning I woke up and looked in the mirror it had seemed like the mark had slowly faded. But nevertheless it stuck in my mind. At first it seemed like the end of the world, trotting around the playground with people pointing and laughing at my scar, but I guess from that I learnt that I had no true friends who would stick their neck out for me. Just perfect. I’d rather be alone anyway rather than lonely. That’s the difference between me and the others. Because the moment I stopped caring about what others said about me I saw through the masquerades of all my previously trusted peers, I understood they were all the same. Shallow. Self conscious. I guess it didn’t matter now that I look back on it because they were all out for themselves, and when a test of loyalty came, as soon as they were challenged against the majority, they’d ditch you. They ditched me. It’s fine though, because I don’t care about it anymore.

It also was a coincidence that at that time I happened to drop my instruments and my co-curricular, but that didn’t matter either because after all, I didn’t enjoy it and it was totally unrelated. They were just such a pain because I already hated school and I’d rather spend my afternoons tucked away in my tiny corner of the house, flicking through endless streams of media. My guilty conscience. It’s fine though, it didn’t matter at all.

But sometimes I still wonder, why am I obsessed with it? Why was that the only thing I ever thought about in my endless internal monologues? Perhaps it was because…it was my excuse? But how come I had let this stop me all this time? Why hadn’t I just…let go? I thought about it. That’s what it is. A scar.