Temporary state

• Eleise Martin, Grade 12
• Short Story
• 2006

It’s cold. I can feel where the icy wind has cut my cheeks and numbed my blue-tinted lips. I weaved my way across the snow-crusted earth to get here. It’s a pilgrimage I have taken only once before, a long time ago – not long after it happened. But this time it’s different. I am no longer angry and consumed with grief. I have come to her to make things right.

‘I need to be with you,’ slipped past my lips but, against the sound of the bitter wind, it would have been barely audible.

Three years earlier, I’d agreed to be a guinea pig in an experiment – one of the perks of my job in the NSA.

‘Perfectly safe,’ they described it; ‘a temporary state, and able to be reversed at any time.’

The fifty grand was the incentive, with the wedding and new house to pay for. So I agreed to the implant in the back of my neck which would allow me to be awake for days. Then after only a few hours sleep, I could do it again. I was guaranteed that it could be turned off at any time. I learned a guarantee is never enough.

The operation itself was a success. Immediately I felt invincible; I was invincible. That is, until it came time to sleep. They told me I couldn’t. Something had gone wrong. Imagine missing a night’s sleep. Then another, and another, until one day you realise that you can’t remember when one day ends and another begins. Welcome to my life.

I threatened to expose them. That very day, after two months of insomnia, I was arrested by police on my way home. On the way to the station the cops muttered something about my wife and an anonymous tip. I connected the dots. I knew why they’d brought me there, and that I had to get away. Suffice to say I escaped but, in doing so, gave them reason to pursue me. I saw her a week later. I was overwhelmed with rage, and longed to join her. But there was something I had to do first. On those who put me into my own personal hell, I took revenge. One by one, I gave them something they took from me and, like me, it wasn’t a temporary state.

Yes, it has been almost three years since that operation or, to put it another way, ninety-four million, six-hundred-and-eight thousand seconds since the last day of my life. With me this morning, I’ve taken the only thing I know that can finally let me sleep. I admire the polished metal, the lacquered handle, and the single gold-tipped object within it. I turn, taking one last look at the light.

‘My love,’ I say, the wind still carrying my voice, ‘I’m going to be with you.’

I’m met with a feeling of relief; comforted by the approaching darkness. I do, after all, have a lot of sleep to catch up on.


Word Count: 500 Words


Name: Eleise Martin
Age: 17
Address: 25 Prelate Court, Wynn Vale, South Australia, 5127
Year Level: 12
School: Kildare College